I find myself getting bored. ...... and not wanting to do much. It just comes with time but its new to me. I need to find a way to make life more inspiring or at least have more to do. I try to read but then with in a few words get bored. I don't like this at all and want to use an old coping skill to get rid of the boredom. .its not helping. Just causing pain... and a bit more shame. Okay so its shame if I get caught. .... oh wait that's guilt. Why can't I escape this yet. I want to play music but it hurts to play..... I need hand strength to do things that I love. And the boredom is becoming more extreme and full of guilt. Then I think of wanting to escape through a bad coping mechanism.
Wednesday, April 8, 2015
Saturday, April 4, 2015
Dailies and Why we do what we do
I've been told dailies help, so I'm going to try it. The last few weeks have been hard and now as I sit and listen to this video, I find that I need to take notes. (video to be given at the end)
There are 4 areas
Relationships
Emotional
Physical
Spiritual
The relationship part is one that I need to work on the most!! What can I do every day to ensure recovery??
Relationships: Get on Social Media and Talk with someone everyday.
Emotional: Journal or Blog
Physical: Walk
Spiritual: Scripture study
There are 4 areas
Relationships
Emotional
Physical
Spiritual
The relationship part is one that I need to work on the most!! What can I do every day to ensure recovery??
Relationships: Get on Social Media and Talk with someone everyday.
Emotional: Journal or Blog
Physical: Walk
Spiritual: Scripture study
This is from another video that I really liked, with some of my notes that I want to think about and really discover for myself.... but I ran our of energy tonight.
What are you going to do?
What does it mean?
What am I going to focus on?
Forces that shape us: In the moment and long-term
6 Needs
Personality 4 main needs:
Certainty
Uncertainty- surprises
Critical- feel special
Connection and Love
Needs of Spirit:
Grow
Contribute beyond ourselves
What is my lead system?
What is my map?
Emotion. 6 thousand emotions: Dominate emotions???
Wednesday, March 11, 2015
Fear
I'm changing the content of this blog.. But just for today... I want to focus on my fears and a book called "A Year without Fear" by Tama Kieves. (ISBN: 978-0-399-17353-0) I found this book at the library and wanted to dive into living without fear. I encourage you to buy the book.... as soon as I can I think I'll get it. :)
I was on top of a ladder, one with 12 or so steps and became fearful of heights, then I thought, of all that could happen and it impacted me. I've been afraid of falling off the ladder, which is very common. But today, I want to focus on that and find something to help me overcome my fears, and this book seems like the best place to start.... "Today, I love with boldness. I'm not worried about taking the 'right' actions" This seems to fit the situation. I was afraid that I was not taking the correct actions to keep me safe on top of a ladder.
The previous day talks about saying no to some actions, I have the opportunity to say no, and to say yes. This weekend there is a conference that I want to go to... but it all depends on work. Or I could just say no to work, and say yes the the conference. Decisions, Decisions, but I will not live my life in fear of doing something. That is just something that I have done way too much.
I looked ahead at another date and found this, "Today, I take my time. I have nothing to prove." Now I have to say Wait a minute!!!!!! Taking my time to do things because I have nothing to prove... how can this be. But then I look up and see that Artists take their time in perfecting their creations, just like musicians!!! I don't have to prove anything to myself, Just have to be the best that I can be.
I think that's enough for today. Now to go back to 12 step reading to overcome an addiction. At least I am awake and wanting to do other things than just watch Netflix all day long.
This is a little sample in hopes that many others will buy the book. I will not post more than this, But I can't wait to read the rest of the days. :) Dates not used on purpose. Happy hunting.
I feel so much better after posting this, it has helped me to see that I have lived in fear for quite a long time and, it needs to end. I can't wait to read the rest of the book and journal about it in my personal journal. Although I may share my insights here.
I was on top of a ladder, one with 12 or so steps and became fearful of heights, then I thought, of all that could happen and it impacted me. I've been afraid of falling off the ladder, which is very common. But today, I want to focus on that and find something to help me overcome my fears, and this book seems like the best place to start.... "Today, I love with boldness. I'm not worried about taking the 'right' actions" This seems to fit the situation. I was afraid that I was not taking the correct actions to keep me safe on top of a ladder.
The previous day talks about saying no to some actions, I have the opportunity to say no, and to say yes. This weekend there is a conference that I want to go to... but it all depends on work. Or I could just say no to work, and say yes the the conference. Decisions, Decisions, but I will not live my life in fear of doing something. That is just something that I have done way too much.
I looked ahead at another date and found this, "Today, I take my time. I have nothing to prove." Now I have to say Wait a minute!!!!!! Taking my time to do things because I have nothing to prove... how can this be. But then I look up and see that Artists take their time in perfecting their creations, just like musicians!!! I don't have to prove anything to myself, Just have to be the best that I can be.
I think that's enough for today. Now to go back to 12 step reading to overcome an addiction. At least I am awake and wanting to do other things than just watch Netflix all day long.
This is a little sample in hopes that many others will buy the book. I will not post more than this, But I can't wait to read the rest of the days. :) Dates not used on purpose. Happy hunting.
I feel so much better after posting this, it has helped me to see that I have lived in fear for quite a long time and, it needs to end. I can't wait to read the rest of the book and journal about it in my personal journal. Although I may share my insights here.
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