Pain

Having not only mental pain, but physical pain. I need to study, but the pain is getting too bad. I will be getting it looked at, but still I feel like I need to just let the pain go. The pain is becoming a substitute for si, which is good, but also really bad, I could be letting something go, that could be life-threatening. But at the same time my thoughts go a different direction, and I don't like that direction. Yes, I have not gotten much sleep, and the sleep that I get, is not good, but still my thoughts are interrupting my ability to think about the studies that I need to learn. If only I had more time in the day. Sure I got back before I thought that I would but, spending time at the doc's office is not what I wanted. At the same time I need to feel good to do well in school.

If only there was enough hours in the day to work, study, and heal myself. I want to do so much more and yet I don't get to, I need to set it as a priority, but I just don't have the strength right now to get the things done that I need to. I hate having only 24 hours in a day, I want to have more. But the universe does not work that way. Guess  I'll have to make time for all that I need to do.